Gay/Lesbian relationships has been promoted throughout the world where somr countries have even passed laws for homosexuals marriages.
Gay SA Radio presenter Waseem Imam Saheb of a show titled “Steam Room” took time out to speak to The Bokem Legacy team to discuss issues pertaining to the world of homosexuals and how people can become more accepting that this world is real. Check out his interview below.
1. How would you describe yourself in a sentence?
I am made up of many layers of Love, Compassion, Spirituality, Strength, Power and Authenticity
2. How did you discover that you were attracted to the same sex?
I can remember as far back as the age of three, i have always been attracted to the same sex. It was just an issue of time, emotional and spiritual growth that determined when I reconciled my sexuality with my being.
3. Approaching your parents about such isn’t an easy task, how did you go through the process of letting them know and how did they react towards you being homosexual?
The matter was taken out of my hands because I was outed by my older sibling. My parents awkwardly confronted me one saturday morning over breakfast when I was around 16. It was rather a hilarious confrontation because it involved tonnes of humour on my part based on my parents reactions to my answer to their questions. But the days after weren’t easy. It has taken many years of arguments and conversations to get to where we are now. Which is a semblance of peace and acceptance of sorts.
4. What’s the most difficult part about being homosexual?
I think navigating both the preconceived notions that both heterosexual and homosexual societies have towards LGBT people who are “OUT”. Its a tricky mixed bag of support and vilification from both sides. All in all an LGBT person just wants to live their lives freely, achieving their dreams and goals much like their heterosexual counterparts.
5. You have your own show on Gay SA radio… “Steam Room” , tell me all about your show and how do you go about getting content for your show?
My show the steam room is an adult sex and relationship show that airs live on Gay SA radio every wednesday nights at 8pm. Every week i tackle either issues relating to relationships (romantic, familial or friendship) or sexual practices. The purpose of the show is to encourage listeners, to enlighten themselves as human beings regarding these issues, so they can lead healthy and productive social lives, both in and outside of the community.
6. What are your thoughts about homophobic people?
I just find them frustrating. If you look at us as a species, we have made advances in medicine, science and technology etc and yet socially, we are still battling issues of homophobia, sexism and racism with other added isms that have popped up in the recent years. I truly wish for us to make progress on a social level so we can evolve from the archaic norms of the patriarchal world that still govern us today that should remain in the past. All in all, Homophobic people are a reminder of the ills of patriarchy.
7. Your advise to parents who has a child/children who are homosexual?
I think understanding is key. A lot of ignorance and fear is founded deeply on misinformation and misconceptions. Which arise due to poorly developed media constructs that are out there, that promote and enforce the negative image built by a patriarchal media system.
My advise to parents of LGBT kids is to first realize and acknowledge their love for their child as the foundation to build all their future actions upon.
And that if they believe ones sexuality can be turned off and on by “a mental switch” of sorts i suggest, they (the parents) turn their switch from straight to gay for a year and then switch it back to straight to show their kids how easy it is to change ones sexuality. Because it’s that easy right?
Secondly there are social groups and foundations that do provide parents of LGBT kids with tool kits and classes, educating and empowering them to support their kids adequately.
Thirdly parents need to understand and accept there will be ignorant people who will ridicule you and your child.
There will be people, even family members who will try to emotionally abuse and blackmail you into rejecting your child . Some may cut all contact with you but its important to acknowledge which relationships in your life are important to you. The relationship with your child is the legacy of your relationship with your spouse and of your family. Therefore, it should be cared for and honored as such.
So take stock of what relationships are important today,and don’t expect a child who is abused emotionally and physically to stand by you in the future. Forgiveness can only go so far. I know many a soul who after coming out to their families in their teens, become spiritually and emotionally hollow individuals because they were disowned and thrown on to the streets by their so called “loving” families.
I have seen so many families use their love, blood and family wealth to abuse their kids into the closet for the “sake of family reputation”. Only to find these poor men and women turn to substance abuse later on their lives.
So take stock and be wise about how you treat those you claim to love.
8. What is your aim regarding your radio show and do you have plans that you’d like to reveal to us?
The aim is to educate and empower the listeners. So that they can make better, positive decisions in their relationships to benefit themselves, their partners and the community as a whole.
I have a few things planned but you will have to tune in to find out what (wink wink)
9. Your words of encouragement to those living in the “closet” in terms of their sexuality…
What I generally tell closeted LGBT that come to me for help regarding this issue:
That coming out from the “closet of Narnia”, truly feels like you are being born again.
The deep emotional and spiritual weights get lifted off your soul and you feel lighter at having to lead just one instead of two.
And your life truly begins once you start living it for you. You can finally “breathe”.
Your parents, family and friends, each have their own lives to lead and it is emotional abuse, blackmail and selfishness if they ask you to live a lie or expect or force you to live a lie. Yes they will be angry. Yes they might to abuse you physically and emotionally. But you need to be strong and have faith that it will take them time to adjust, adapt and accept you.
God’s Love will find you in other forms and other people so you won’t truly be alone. Trust in your God.
For I truly believe that each of us are given our lives to live for ourselves and not for your friends, colleagues, family or even spouses.
10. What inspires you and why?
People, generally activists with their bravery to speak out against the ills of this world inspire me. And people who aren’t afraid to be themselves. And finally the love I see in the world inspires me.